There comes a point in every leader’s life when what once worked no longer does.
Not because you failed — but because grace intervened.
I had reached what most would call the top of my game — a Blue Diamond leader with essential oil giant dōTERRA, leading a global team of more than 7,500 across multiple countries. I prided myself with see trends before they happened, anticipate shifts, and lead through them with clarity, I was trusted because of those insights.
Privately, I’d even sensed trouble was imminent for the world, and that it would impact everything — the way we worked, lived, and interacted. But I had no idea how deep that shaking would go, or how personally it would reach.
That was more than 5 years ago now. What I didn’t realise then was that the real disruption coming was not just in the business, but in the absolute essence of who I was, as well.
The truth is, my identity had become completely wrapped up in what I could do myself — in my own capacity, my own drive, my own plans. I didn’t know Him then. I only knew how to work hard, push forward, and produce. It wasn’t faith that was fuelling me; it was self.
That is a path for collision with cortisol and burnout. It created a runaway train that drove me, not the other way around. And it was successful — until it wasn’t.
When the momentum stopped, I found myself climbing out of the wreckage, disoriented and depleted, unsure where to even begin. My old levers didn’t work anymore. My old desires had fallen away. What I thought was strength was really strain.
That season became the beginning of regeneration — the kind of rebirth Jesus spoke of with Nicodemus. It wasn’t behaviour modification; it was heart transformation. God was removing the heart of stone and giving me a heart of flesh. The system that once ran on adrenaline was being rewritten by grace.
You don’t know yourself in the middle of it — because you’re no longer you.
You’re His.
“And they shall be my people, and I will be their God… I will give them one heart and one way…” — Jeremiah 32:38–40
What followed felt like open-heart surgery while I was wide awake.
There was no manual for it, no mentor to explain what was happening (initially). I didn’t even own a Bible. I didn’t have anyone in my world who really knew God — but I knew He was with me.
It was raw, confronting, and deeply personal. Grace wasn’t tidy; it was invasive. It cut through everything I thought I knew about success, leadership, and self. Looking back, that’s what regeneration really is — when God reaches into the operating system of your life and begins to write a new one while you’re still conscious. You can feel every incision, every removal, every replacement of the heart.
And I cried — a lot. Grateful. Confused. Undone. Wrapped in a love I had never known.
You reach a point where you just can’t pull from the areas of previous strength anymore — because they were never true strength, just illusion.
It can look like depression — it’s not.
It can look like dysfunction — it’s not.
It can look like cortisol overload — it might even feel like that — but what’s really happening is that God is taking away an old identity and placing a new one there.
“And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you…” — Ezekiel 36:26
If this is what’s happening in you, those verses should feel wildly comforting.
They describe what renewal actually looks like when it’s happening inside a leader: old systems shut down, new circuitry is installed, and everything starts to run from a different source.
| Before → After | How It Now Functions |
|---|---|
| Strategic → Arranger | I don’t have to control the plan; I simply arrange what He places in front of me and thrive in divine order. |
| Activator → Learner | I still move, but slower now — deeper. I lead from curiosity and communion, not impulse. |
| Maximiser → Maximiser | Still present, but now excellence looks like obedience, not overachievement. |
| Ideation → Ideation | I still generate ideas, but they flow from revelation rather than restlessness. |
| Futuristic → Individualisation | I no longer chase what’s next; I focus on who’s here. Compassion replaced projection. |
Over time, I began to see that God hadn’t removed my Strengths — He was rebuilding them. Not in the same order, and not for the same reasons.
The wiring was still mine — but the current was His.
He rebuilt the way I lead — from striving to stewardship, from self-definition to divine direction.
Grace Rewrites the Wiring
Over time, I began to see that God hadn’t removed my Strengths — He was rebuilding them. The wiring was still mine, but the current was His.
Strategic became Arranger.
I no longer need to control the plan; I simply arrange what He places in front of me and thrive in divine order.
Activator became Learner.
I still move — but slower now, deeper. I lead from curiosity and communion, not impulse.
Maximiser remained Maximiser.
It’s still there, but excellence now looks like obedience, not overachievement.
Ideation remained Ideation.
Ideas still come, but they flow from revelation rather than restlessness.
Futuristic became Individualisation.
I no longer chase what’s next; I focus on who’s here. Compassion replaced projection.
He rebuilt the way I lead — from striving to stewardship, from self-definition to divine direction.
The same gifts, sanctified.
The same Strengths, surrendered.
“Every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” — John 15:2
“In quietness and trust shall be your strength.” — Isaiah 30:15
Those two verses describe the same process: pruning produces fruit; quietness produces strength.
What feels like delay is often divine re-alignment.
Grace fills the gap between who you were and who He’s forming you to be.
If you find yourself in that gap, don’t rush to fix it.
Let the pruning do its work.
Let the quiet shape your strength.
Let grace rebuild the way you lead.
And if you’re in a season where everything that once worked no longer does — if you sense God is rewriting how you lead and who you are — I’d love to help you explore what He’s doing.
This kind of work is what I do every day inside my dōTERRA coaching and mentoring — helping people rediscover who they are in business and leadership through Strengths, purpose, and grace. It’s completely free as part of how I serve our community.
Founder, Sycamore Wellbeing
If you’re in a season where everything that once worked no longer does, I’d love to help you discern what God might be rebuilding.
This kind of mentoring — uncovering who you are in business and leadership through Strengths, purpose, and grace — is part of my coaching with dōTERRA, and it’s completely my Sycamore community.